Creation Science 101

God made the world in seven days
Well, that’s one week to be specific
Now, that’s what I call scientific
Say Hallelujah, sing His praise

Four thousand forty-two B.C
On Monday, August twenty-seven
He made the earth and sky and Heaven
Then he punched out at five-oh-three

Then he made Adam, and then Eve
A garden for them to inhabit
The apple right where Eve could grab it
And I’ve got proof, ‘cause I believe

Creation Science 101
In the beginning it begun
And you are just beginning to educate yourself when you shun
Evolution

Then Cain and Abel he begat
And they begat all of the rest to us
Which means they must have been incestuous
I’m going to have to pray about that

There might be sinners in this class
Who might believe in Charles Darwin
I guess that’s just their loss and our win
Because I’m gonna flunk their ass

If you make Genesis your text
You’ll laugh at Darwin and what he sees
To be the origin of species
Because he’s just plain oversexed

Creation Science 101
You ain’t no monkey’s great grandson
You’ve got a research paper due
‘bout the fifty reason to shun
Evolution

Don’t let em’ hand you that old jive
About survival of the fittest
That notion don’t pass the bullshit test
‘Cause look at me, I’m still alive

God made the world just like it is
He made the fossils just to tease us
Old bones to test our faith in Jesus
Yeah, this’ll all be on the quiz

Creation Science 101
Now Armagedd- your homework done
Because when this semester’s through
It’s straight A’s for students who shun Evolution

The kids get such an education
When they shun
The heretical theory of the development of life on earth over millions of years by means of spontaneous genetic mutation